Mothers are probably the most nurturing individuals that you would ever come across in your life. But as they grow old, taking care of them does become difficult. There are tabloids which often suggest that taking care of your ailing mother is a blessing in disguise. But is it a blessing or there is more to it? Some people have often said that “my elderly mother is consuming my life”. But why is that so? In this context, we are going to talk about the realities of taking care of elderly mothers and how it can be taxing for both your professional as well as personal life.
Taking Care of Elderly Mothers – Navigating Through the Challenges
While the notion, “my elderly mother is consuming my life” is very common, knowing the challenge can help you to better navigate through the same. Some of these factors that you might across often are:
1. Emotional Strain
The first and most common aspect that is associated with taking care of elderly mothers is the emotional strain associated with it. Watching a parent age and simply not being able to do anything can be extremely taxing on you. For most of us, the mother figure is evergreen and there are even a few things that they are not able to do!
When you encounter regularly that there are many things now that they are unable to do, this emotional strain can be quite common. The emotional strain might often manifest itself in the form of grief, fatigue, guilt or even frustration. Sometimes, in more severe cases it is very common that you feel bouts of depression and this can lead to emotional turbulence.
2. Physical Exhaustion
A lot of the time, the feeling of “my elderly mother is consuming my life” stems from the physical exhaustion that is associated with caregiving. Now that your mother is ageing it is common that she is not able to perform the activities that she originally used to do. Not only that, in a lot of cases you have to take over her responsibilities as well which could be physically exhausting.
Physical care often involves taking up responsibility for various activities like bathing and dressing as well as taking care of their toilet needs. These physical demands can take a toll on the caregiver’s health, leading to fatigue and burnout.
3. Social Isolation
If you are taking care of your elderly mother regularly then at times you might face social isolation on multiple occasions. This means that you will be unable to show up for events just because you cannot afford to leave your elderly mother alone at home. This is the most common instance when a lot of people feel “my elderly mother is consuming my life”.
When you are taking care of your elderly mother it becomes extremely difficult to take out time to enjoy with your friends or even for some relaxation. Even if you do manage to take the time, there is often a fear of being judged by society. This leads to social isolation that just gets worse with time and you find yourself alone very often.
Best Strategies for Coping
If you do not want to feel constantly about how my elderly mother is consuming my life, then ideally there are some things you think that you can do to make yourself feel a little better. Firstly, it is extremely important to not constantly pester yourself. A lot of time more than anybody else, it is we who keep on putting undue pressure on ourselves. Always acknowledge the fact that it is okay to seek support and get help from professionals so that your mother is in safe hands. A professional care will always be able to understand her needs better and then act accordingly.
Along with that, giving a little bit of importance to self-care could also be quite life-changing. Whether it’s exercising, practicing mindfulness, or pursuing a hobby, carving out time for yourself is essential for maintaining your well-being. This ensures that you constantly do not feel “my elderly mother is consuming my life”. If there are other family members then it is okay to delegate some of the responsibilities to them instead of taking all of it up on your shoulders.
Sometimes if the situation is too serious then constantly taking care of your elderly mother can be taxing. It is suggested that you reach out to professional caregivers who know the best way to help you. There are healthcare providers who are specifically vested with the task of providing elderly patients with support and care. Remember, you are not alone, and it is okay to ask for help when needed.